Dear J.T. & Dale: I'm coming to you because I need some "authority" to help convince my son of his folly. While away at college, he thinks it is OK to mention on public forums (such as Twitter) that he uses drugs. Aside from the fact that this information is most disturbing to his parents, I've told him that such information will exclude him from almost every job opportunity. How do I put weight behind my argument? - Concerned Mom
J.T.: Young people today love social media and use them to impress their peers. Anticipating the need to impress employers is not yet a concern for them, and I doubt your son would be swayed by the opinions of newspaper columnists. However, do a quick online search about college students getting in trouble for what they post online, and you'll find plenty of articles to pass along to him, and maybe, over time, he will start to be more cautious.
DALE: There's a little, inexpensive Kindle book by Peter K. England about dealing with a headstrong teen that has the provocative title "What Do You Say When Your Daughter Says 'F**K YOU!'?" The logic of that book fits what J.T. is recommending: You can't teach someone who doesn't want to learn, but with patience you may entice your son to educate himself. In addition to articles about students getting in trouble, you might bring the issue home to him by having a discussion about places he'd love to work. For instance, if he considers working for Apple to be a dream job, you can go online and find their drug policy ... "Apple is a drug-free workplace. Employees are prohibited from manufacturing, distributing, dispensing, possessing, using, or being under the influence of illegal drugs, inhalants or controlled substances in the workplace. Any employee who violates this policy may be subject to disciplinary action up to and including termination." Reading such policies, he might understand that good companies can be choosy about employees and that many check job applicants' online histories. Will this strategy work? Probably not, but one of the lessons of England's book is that there's patience and peace in knowing that you've done your part and more.
Quit work to seek job?
Dear J.T. & Dale: After six years of working in my field, I decided to go back to school for a master's degree. After earning my degree, I took a "temporary" job (contract work - dead-end and underpaid) to fill any holes in my résumé. That was a year ago, and working full time has not left much time to mount a serious job search. My question is, is it better to quit in order to rededicate myself to a search, or to remain employed and hope for the best? - Scott
J.T.: As a career coach, I cannot in good conscience advise you to quit your job to look for a new one. The average search takes nine months or more, and there are studies showing that unemployed people are discriminated against in competing for jobs. Unless you have the means to be out of work for a year, keep the temporary job.
DALE: Which takes you right back to the conundrum of looking for work while being busy working. The first thing to do is to turn your current job into a networking vortex by being The Most Curious Guy On the Planet. Meet all the co-workers and suppliers you can, and find out where they've worked and who they might know. Then, learn to turn your lunches and breaks into job-search time.
J.T.: Ideally, you can find three two-hour blocks of time each week. Then create an Interview Bucket List of companies in your area that hire people with your skill set. Research these firms, and set up Google Alerts to keep current. Finally, turn to your Curious Guy networking efforts, along with social media, to meet people in those companies. Set up meetings, establish rapport and keep in touch. That way, you'll have a shot at being among the first to hear about new job openings. If you focus on these steps, I think you'll find a new role without risking the cost of unemployment.
JEANINE "J.T." TANNER O'DONNELL is a professional development specialist. DALE DAUTEN resolves employment and other business disputes as a mediator. Visit them at jtanddale.com, where you can send questions via email, or write to them in care of King Features Syndicate, 300 W. 57th St., 15th Floor, New York, NY 10019.