Dear J.T. & Dale: My department was given a new supervisor a year ago. He is an older worker who has not stayed current with technology but still knows it all, and if you don't believe it, ask him. He moved me into a leadership role, and my reward is his constant jealousy. He often calls me down, despite the successes of my team and the money we have saved the company. I have started looking for a better job. I really need advice. - Angie
J.T.: I'm glad to hear that you are looking for work, because that would be my first advice. Now, ramp up your search. First, create an Interview Bucket List - that's a list of the best companies in your area that hire people like you. Next, start researching those companies online to find people you could talk to. Then, here's the secret to turning meetings into job offers: With your experience, I'm sure you'll spot problems you could help those companies fix. Find their pain and be the aspirin. Doing this, you'll not only meet people who will respect your knowledge, but they'll want to refer you to open positions, even to ones that haven't been publicly posted. That's how you open the door to the "hidden job market."
DALE: I don't disagree. However, let me offer you my best advice about difficult people.
I was looking for a way to explain to my three kids that most people are basically good, despite all the evidence to the contrary. So here's the rule: Every 10th person you meet is a jerk, and the other nine are jerks one-tenth of the time. You see the beauty of this - that despite annoyances, you can hold strong in your conviction of basic goodness.
Getting back to your situation, Angie, it certainly sounds as though your boss falls into the 1-in-10. You probably would be wise to go elsewhere. However, this is an opportunity to work on the endlessly useful art of getting along with difficult people.
The key is to treat the difficult ones as unusually valuable - it confuses them. So, ask for advice. Ask for help thinking through problems. They need to feel indispensible. Meanwhile, remind yourself that there is good in that person. Even if no one sees it, there's good inside. It's there. God put it there. Yes, God. Talk to the good, and the rest will follow.
J.T.: That's a beautiful sentiment. However, while you're working on being noble, practice proactive job searching. Think how much easier it will be at the next job: After a manager like this one, you'll be the most appreciative employee your new employer has ever seen.
References gone awry
Hello J.T. & Dale: I am making a reentry into the work force. Here's the rub: My work history has gone awry. By that I mean that one major employer no longer exists, another was sold and so on. When submitting a job application or resume, how do I address the fact that there is no way to contact my previous employers? - Mary
J.T.: To start, I'd strongly suggest that you do your best to track down former managers at those defunct businesses.
DALE: Yes, even though the companies don't exist, the people do. You list your former employer on your resume, and only later, when it comes time for reference checking, will you need to provide contact information.
J.T.: Social media has made it much easier for us to find people. Seek out individuals to serve as references who can validate your work history.
For those organizations where you can't locate anyone, simply list the company as out of business. The most important thing is to not leave blank any part of the application. Applicant tracking systems are picky about things like that. Be sure to put something in those fields, or you will be screened out.
DALE: And don't feel that your time spent tracking down former managers and colleagues is distracting from your job search - it's a marvelous way to network, and reconnecting with people is the most lively and enjoyable form of job searching.
JEANINE "J.T." TANNER O'DONNELL is a professional development specialist. DALE DAUTEN resolves employment and other business disputes as a mediator. Please visit them at jtanddale.com, where you can send questions via email, or write to them in care of King Features Syndicate, 300 W. 57th St., 15th Floor, New York, NY 10019.